note to self

note to self,

just to be clear,
I don't do polite requests, or demands,
unless I want to!
and I will listen to that voice that says,
'do you want to do this, is this right for you?'
oh and I'm not going to feel guilty either.
So I may have to re-write the rules of etiquette,
or just throw them away.

and so with that said,
I would also like to say,
 set your compass,
in a direction,
 set off,
leave behind unresolved trickyness,
move on,
sometimes it's all we can do,

go the way that feels clear,
go the way which feeds you,
follow heart and inspirations,
set off,
go where you want to go,

This is my own quiet little revolution of 'no please don't ask me'!

Sometimes I am a funny fish,
and no not a pisces,
you see, in my life I hold all the balls in the air,
but here,
I don't have to,
So please don't ask me, even politely!

This post was inspired by Susannah Conway's post here.

Do you find it hard not do the expected?


  1. I think it's hard for us women to just do what we want, especially when we become mothers! There's always someone making some demands! I thinks it's perfectly acceptable to say no, not do things just because others expect us to unfortunately there's usually some 'fallout' from this which we usually have to then deal with! Enjoy your revolution! :) x

    1. yes, agreed, the fallout can be difficult. But I think that at a certain stage of our lives, when we are trying to create something for instance that we need to have a chance to hear our own voice and direction, rather than living from a state of reaction to what is being presented to us! x

  2. I Liked this post, Heather, as YOU got me a thinking...
    I think as you grow a little older and a little wiser....You learn to live by your own lights.....I like meeting 'funny fish', types.....I find them intriguing and most certainly interesting! In saying this I myself am most certainly not a leader and defiantly not a follow......YEY enjoy those resolutions :} ~ and your Sunday Too!
    Love Maria x

    1. thank you Maria, I really like that expression, live by your own lights! I'm imagining turning on my headlights!! x

  3. Oops should have gone to Spec Savers, OF course it should read a follower! hehe..

  4. I am terrible for saying "yes" to everything then kicking myself afterwards. Sometimes it's good to say "no" to the constant demands. Well done for following your own path and allowing yourself room to breathe.

    Gillian x

    1. Gillian, your probably a whole lot nicer than I am!! x

  5. I have a natural instict to go agains the norm but get so sick of being made to feel the " funny little freind" the quirky one" "odd". But joy of joys my daughter announced last week that she is quirky and jolly happy to be so. So I am ditching the guilt and doing my thing. I am fairly harmless after all!!

  6. Gosh this chimes with me. I am SO bad at agreeing to things (and sometimes actively volunteering for things) when the voice inside me is screaming "noooooo". I don't know why I do it as it always ends up causing me so much more stress doing the thing I either couldn't fit in alongside other stuff or didn't want to do in the first place. My husband is way better at saying no to things. And he does so without ever seemingly causing offence. I think it must be a woman thing - we're often all so desperate to please, we put everyone else before ourselves. Thank you for posting this!

    1. yes it can be hard to say no without rolling out a whole load of reasons why not, there is definitely a skill to saying a simple no. We should practise! but perhaps if we are living as more authentically ourselves, more on our mission so to speak, this would be easier. Perhaps men can be more focused and single minded about things, which helps. x

  7. It gets easier when you realize it's quality over quantity. I would rather do a few things well, than many thing half @$$-ed. We can't do it all, and we aren't contributing more if that's what we're trying to do.

  8. Oh my god Heather, reading your post was like someone stepping inside my head. I, from I don't know where, have decided to take the same approach. I used to be so soft, people would walk allover me, I would not say "No" now I have found my inner voice and it may offend some people but I listen to my gut feeling and my heart and do as I please now. To be honest its a totally brillint way to be. I am happy being me. Do what you wish and dream for, don't let people tie you into something you don't want to do or places you dont want to go. Stay strong and be you.
    Best wishes

  9. Thanks for posting this, Heather.
    I firmly believe in answering our inner "calling", and living an authentic life. At a certain point of my own journey, the little voice that was whispering inside me started screaming so loudly that I couldn't ignore it anymore. I just had to "begin", and live accordingly to my mission in this life. This meant I had to face my fears, and dismantle them one by one; meant lerning to say no, meant to finally free myself from imposed and self-imposed rules and boundaries, and the nice opinion of the others, to just follow my heart and my inner inspiration. So hold on and just follow that little voice. It always tells the truth.

  10. I used to, but those twinges of guilt are almost completely banished.
    I took a one year sabbatical from all my activities and it changed my life.
    That was...five years ago.
    Now I am still learning to do the work I am blessed with, but to also LIVE.